Are you a Sober Curious Parent?
There’s been a lot of buzz in the media and here at Parent Wellness Group about the role of alcohol in our lives - and in our parenting! There’s been a shift in our culture when it comes to alcohol consumption and for once, it’s not a new study convincing us that despite how alcohol can make you feel the day after, it’s actually fine! Enter: the Sober Curious Movement.
For many years, moms in particular have been targeted with alcohol and, specifically, wine marketing as a way to wind down from the stresses of parenthood and life. However, as many of us know, alcohol has been linked to cancer and other health issues - and doesn’t usually make us feel very good! As mental health experts, we also know and acknowledge the fact that alcohol is a depressant, and not a good choice for our mental health.
Being a parent, the most important gift you can give your child is someone who shows up consistently as the most present and intentional version of themselves. Someone who can always look them in the eyes and make the connection. This gives a child a sense of calm, safety and trust.
I have recently embarked on the sober curious journey, and I have already learned so much. If you, like me, are a sober curious parent, here’s what I’ve learned from my experience and my advice for those looking to cut alcohol.
The Benefits of Being a Sober Curious Parent
Mental Clarity, grounding, presence for those you care about (ie your kids and partner), experiencing your feelings (for better or worse) instead of numbing them so you can begin to process and let go.
A healthier gut and digestive tract
Authentic and meaningful relationships
Better quality of SLEEP
A true sense of grounded spirituality (not the “connection to a higher power” we ‘think’ we’re having in an altered state)
More radiant-looking skin
Actually connecting with people and remembering the conversations (when we are under the influence of a substance we are in fact creating dis-connect).
More ENERGY!!!-us parents need all the help we can get there…
Eventual brain re-wiring and new neuropathways (instead of the short circuits caused by substance use that decrease impulse control and seek dopamine rushes)
More space to develop (or go back to) fulfilling hobbies and interests
Tips for Sober Curious Parents
Ask yourself: What am I looking for? Oftentimes, we aren’t really craving a drink, but instead, rest or something fun!
Get to know what you like! There are some pretty damned good mocktails out there and NA beers & wines that make it hard to feel like you’re not celebrating/unwinding!
Be prepared at social events. Bring your own mocktails or seltzers to those holiday parties so you will always feel comfortable.
Decide what you will say when asked why you’re not drinking. This doesn’t mean you have to explain yourself! You can simply state, I’m not drinking tonight. Or you can say things like “I don’t love the way it makes me feel”. Having your answer ready makes this less disruptive.
Know your bar order. For me, it’s soda & a dash of bitters w/lemon or soda and cranberry w/ lime.
Cheers to a more grounded, healthier, happier you!