Is It Time For Therapy?
Starting a relationship with a therapist can be a difficult and vulnerable step to take. Particularly as a parent, it can feel like asking or needing help somehow negates our qualifications as a caregiver or a leader in our families. Despite what our society has taught many of us, it is not wrong to ask for help. In fact, the more you can support yourself (with the help of others and professionals!), the more capable you’ll become in caring for your children.
In this digital age, we have access to so many resources online (including this blog!) and can feel like it’s quicker, cheaper, or just plain easier to spend time following mental health professionals or the wellness community to find the answers we are seeking. While these platforms can provide some ease and make therapeutic resources and information much more accessible, they can also increase overwhelm, anxiety, feelings of guilt, and pose the risk of comparison that might leave us feeling badly about ourselves–all important things to pay attention to.
So, how do you know when it’s time to start therapy?
Here’s a quick guide to help you with some of the more common therapy questions we’ve heard.
What are some signs therapy might be right for you?
Short answer: Suffering, curiosity, mood changes, major life events, your usual coping skills no longer work. *Note: this list is not conclusive and if you feel the nudge to reach out, please do!
If you notice yourself becoming more and more frustrated, anxious, sad, overwhelmed and finding it is harder to manage the day to day.
If you are impacted more often by distressing thoughts and feelings.
If you are feeling exhausted, burnt out, or just plain tired.
If you have tried many different strategies but wonder if there are more out there that you’re not thinking about.
If you are feeling stuck or noticing that you are caught in a cycle of repeating the same unhelpful patterns.
If you want a neutral, objective person who is not a family member or friend to talk to who might offer a different perspective, help you consider a new way of thinking, and share new tools and ideas to help you cope.
If there is a very specific issue or challenge that you want to process with nonjudgmental guidance and support.
If you are noticing conflict or communication challenges in your relationship.
If you’ve had a traumatic experience and need a place to process and cope with it.
If you are suffering or unhappy and just want to feel joy, happiness, better!
If you are seeking different or new intentional connection and support and online resources or not providing the solution you are looking for.
Is my suffering enough to warrant therapy?
Short Answer: Therapy is always warranted.
Maybe you’ve tried to manage and cope for so long now but you continue to suffer or just don’t feel quite yourself. No one needs to suffer on their own. Practicing relaxation strategies, meditation, finding time for yourself, relying on apps on your phone, and journaling can all be strategies to help manage distress or unease but you might reach a point where these things don’t feel quite like they are enough. Perhaps it would be helpful to find a therapist to support your mental wellness? Seeking therapy doesn’t mean something is “wrong” with you or there is necessarily a “problem.” Instead, consider therapy as taking a step to be vulnerable, prioritize your needs, and care for your own wellbeing. Therapy can be about reinforcing or enhancing strengths and resilience and learning more about yourself to build connection and continued healing.
Is therapy even worth it?
Short answer: It’s always worth trying.
If the idea of starting therapy feels daunting or like another thing to add to your to-do list, consider whether the benefits outweigh the cons. Spending some time journaling or creating a pros/cons list can be a helpful process in deciding whether you are ready to start therapy, or consider asking friends about their experiences. Normalizing going to therapy is important and going to therapy is an opportunity to invest in and prioritize yourself and your own needs..
What do I look for in a therapist?
Short answer: Do your research and don’t be afraid to shop around.
There are many types of therapists with different areas of expertise but the connection you feel and the relationship you develop with a therapist is a unique one. It’s okay if you don’t feel that connection right away or that it just doesn’t quite feel like the right match. I encourage you to look around, talk to a number of people so that you can get a sense of their style, their practice and their personality. And, if you eventually feel like you don’t quite “click” with the therapist you are seeing, it’s okay to let them know and to find someone who might be a better fit.
Does going to therapy mean there’s something wrong with me?
Short answer: NO.
As a therapist who has been in therapy for years, I am here to tell you that there is no shame in asking for help and accessing support–in fact, I would argue that being able to ask for help from another person can be a sign of strength and self awareness. It is OKAY to be in therapy and we are all deserving of access to help and support.
Above all, I hope you found some answers in this post and feel free to reach out to us at hello@parentwellnessgroup.com with any questions or to book a free consult to see if therapy might be right for you.